Fluffy White Comforter

There are few material things I love more than fresh, clean, crisp linens. I wash my sheets more than most other humans I know.

I had family in town this past weekend and every bed in my home was taken. I love that. I made sure the softest and cleanest sheets were on each bed to assure their comfort, because it's something that's important to me.

After my family left on Sunday afternoon, I spent a good portion of the day washing sheets,  blankets and towels. When I began making the beds back, my dog followed me around and laid in the floor in each room. What a good pup. As I finished making the fluffiest, whitest and biggest bed in the house, he happily leapt on top of the comforter and rolled around. Every part of his body was touched by the crisp white comforter.  Let me remind you, Sunday afternoon was very wet.

I said horrid words.

Actually, I screamed horrid words.

I was so looking forward to collapsing in my bed with a good movie on that rainy Sunday afternoon. But, instead, I was having to figure out how to get mud out of my comforter. Livid. I was livid.

I ended up leaving the house in my anger and going ahead to the church for youth. I decided to ignore the problem. That's always a good decision. (Note the sarcasm.)

And today, I had to pick up my comforter from the dry cleaners. It was a big mess, y'all.

When I made my bed tonight for the third time in four days, my pup was afraid to even walk into the room.... because of my temper the last time he and that crisp white comforter were in the same room.

Oh.


I was then reminded of something so simple about the grace and forgiveness of Christ that PRAISE THE LORD, are nothing like my rage. First,  HE forgives.  I could end this short blog post here. He forgives! He doesn't hold it over us!

Hallelujah and Amen!

But, another mind blowing characteristic of God, He doesn't keep a record of our wrongdoings. Amen! He doesn't give us shame and scorn when we are filthy. When we've jumped right back into our sin, after being cleansed and made white again, he doesn't scream at us with horrid words.  When we roll in the wet mud and dirt, and our "white as snow" becomes no longer recognizable, He doesn't leave us.

He doesn't ignore us.

He doesn't tend to it later.

He picks us up, welcomes us back onto the cleanest, fluffiest white space and tells us we are under His care. We are chosen by Him. We are welcomed by Him. He will forgive us so much, that He even will dwell IN us. There's no amount of shame that can make us unlovable. There's nothing worth hiding. There's nothing worth staying scared in the corner about.

That, my friends, is something to be thankful for. As I type this from my cloud-like bed, I'm thankful He calls me His own and has already washed me as white as this darn comforter. No amount of mud can stain or tarnish His cleanse upon my life. Upon our lives.

Equally As Able

When I was growing up, we sat on the same pew every single Sunday in "big church". We filed on the pew where all the extended Nickles sat. It usually meant that people were sitting in laps and squished against the wooden pew end. My sister and I would fight about who got to sit next to dad, because he would (and still does) extend his arm on the back of the pew. So that meant, it was just the perfect amount of space, for an elementary school girl,  to snuggle up and lean against his side. We would also fight about who got to sign everyone in on the Friendship pad. This was probably the same year that dad kept a running list (with dates) of whose turn it was to sit up front in his car...pre airbag.  Let's just say we argued. We were not always well behaved. Sunday mornings confined in a pew with my sister, were usually recipes for uncontrolled laughter with loud whispers OR snatching pencils out of each other's hands with rage. The beauty of having siblings...

Here we are, disguised as two sisters, who always get along...and match.

I digress. When we sat in this pew, there was another family that sat in front of us, also religiously. They had two children older than us, who were quiet and way cooler. They sat with their parents and elderly grandmother, who at the time, was about 90. Every week, we looked forward to getting to worship early because we knew that meant being offered a peppermint or candy. Bless that Mrs. Brock. She heard the loud giggles, she heard the quick snaps of my parents' angry fingers, she sat on the end of the pew and watched us as we were confirmands, she beamed with pride as we sang upfront with the children's choir and she greeted us with warm hugs as worship was over every morning. Some Sundays, she even offered to have one of us sit with her. And sometimes... we had to take her up on it. She saw (and heard) my parents teach us how to worship. They taught us what it was like to be a part of the community of faith, not simply exist there and keep quiet.  Some mornings it was hard. Those Sundays usually included the rows of people who sat behind us, coming up and giving my parents a good pat on the back with a laugh. Some mornings, it was a delight to sing harmony next to my mom, reading the hymnal and taking tally of our pastor's stories.

I've been questioned a lot this summer about why we didn't have "children's church" during worship over the summer months. I want you, as a church body, to know the reasoning and theology- it's not because our volunteers are tired by the end of the school year (even though that is true). It's because we're trying to give you, parents, an opportunity to teach your child how to worship. It's so easy to send them off to age appropriate time for stories, games and crafts. I am your child's biggest advocate for age appropriate content and learning. I promise! It gives me great joy to creatively teach the gospel in a way that your child developmentally can grasp.

But, just as I harp on the congregation about their baptismal vows, you've vowed the same exact thing. I've tearfully watched you. (You know I love nothing more than a baptism.) You, parent, have vowed to teach them to worship. When other is there time to practice worship except during worship? So that means, even when it's hard. Even when you don't think they understand. You've vowed to help them be integrated into the life of our worshipping community. It's not about waiting until they can pray, believe or worship a certain way. You've vowed to help mold their hearts to WANT to worship. Not just let them blindly sit in your pew as everyone else is engaged in the parts of the service. Obviously, because of their age, and attention span, we know not all of our youngest children can sit through worship. THAT is why children's church exists; to help spiritually supplement those who developmentally cannot make it the entire service. It doesn't exist for childcare. It doesn't exist to teach your children the fundamentals of how to worship within our church family (reminder, that's your biblical role as a parent). It exists for the hard Sundays. It exists so that families can slowly integrate their child into the worshipping community. It isn't meant to be a substitute for worshipping with the body of Christ. Children can worship the exact same way adults can. It just takes guidance, explanation of words, and patience on the part of adults.  I promise. If any adults disagree, just send them my way. Come at me! 

Theologically, our church believes that a child is just as important as the adults they belong with! Both are equally created in the image of God; both equally important in the kingdom. Meaning their worship is equally important to God. Praise God for that! So, I am advocating for children to be present. I'm advocating for children to be seen. I'm advocating for parents to teach their children in the pew. I'm advocating that other adults be the village parents need in order to teach worship habits. It really does go beyond your wisdom and knowledge- bring in the people who sit around you at church into the responsibility of raising your child to worship. Ask other families who have done it well for tips. It's hard- but it's creating a habit and a lifestyle that they will practice their entire lives. What other activity will follow them the entirety of their lives? Do you want the ONE activity they do forever to be taught by anyone other than you? 

The end of September, I'll be teaching a worship education class for children (and their parents) ages 5-2nd grade. Let us help you! Let me get your family paired up with members who would LOVE to sit with you and your learning worshipper in the pew. Let us resource and encourage you, as parents and members of our congregation to help our children learn how to worship.

Thursday Ritual

I met my best friend fall semester of my freshman year of college. She was a beautiful, tall and bubbly girl from North Georgia that lived on my hall. We shared one freshman class together about the life of C.S. Lewis. I knew from the start she was my kind of people. She was immensely more organized than I was (am). Her room was the cutest one on the hall. She was SUCH a better dancer at the fraternity houses.  She was more outgoing and was so gifted in vocalizing her faith. I, on the other hand, turned in wrinkled papers, had a faux leather futon in my room, wore t-shirts with cardigans to the fraternity houses, and was so unbelievably close minded. I am laughing out loud writing this. BLESS.

Fast forward through freshman year,  as we went home with each other on breaks, pledged the same sorority, and worked at a summer camp together. Sophomore year rolled around, and we were roommates. With our majors and extra curricular activities pulling us in opposite directions, we often only saw each other as we were getting in bed in the wee-hours of the morning. So, we started our Thursday ritual. Thursdays at 11am, there were no classes scheduled. Every week, professors had department meetings in this block. Meaning: everyone flooded the ONE dining hall for an early lunch. At PC, it was hard to go anywhere or do anything without other people. Which was AWESOME, but when you need some down, non-togetherness time, it was a bit difficult.

Sarah Beth and I would grab to-go boxes on Thursdays at 11 o'clock religiously, and would eat lunch together in the floor of our room. This often meant each of us would have to turn down other lunch plans to eat together. I almost always got a turkey and cheese sandwich, and Sarah Beth always ventured into some healthy veggies with a few picked apart cookies. We wrapped Christmas lights where the ceiling met the wall in our room, and it was so comfy- and the most cozy room on the hall.  That hour usually involved Grey's Anatomy muted on the TV as we purposefully chatted about what was going on. Our door would stay closed, which was rare for our hall at the time. We would set aside this time once a week. Our time together was (and still is) good for the soul. It encouraged me.  It was something I could count on. I think because we learned that year that our friendship was important, something worth investing in, she's still the person I call for guidance, insight, prayer and encouragement. I know she wants the best for me. What a gem, that Sarah Beth.

As I've learned to better manage my time, I've now realized that no one can live on naps alone, and that the real world is far more demanding of my time than my rigorous 3 hours a day of classes ; so, I've tried to develop little rituals in my week. I purposefully say "yes" to the events and people who help enrich my life and encourage me. That sometimes means learning to say "no", which I have increasingly become worse at doing, the more I get involved in other groups and places. I develop these rituals and "yes" opportunities for my sanity, and I purposefully create times in which I can be challenged by those who love me. I want the people I'm spending time with to deepen my relationship with Christ, and help build disciples. I've had to take steps back from situations asking myself is this person going to encourage me to love others well? Will this conversation pour into me, so I can go and serve others more efficiently? We need to make sure it's people not projects that occupy the sacred places of our lives.

I'm still terrible at saying "no". I over-book, over-commit, over schedule, sleep less, and leave little- to no time for the things that nourish me. I'm still a people pleaser. But, here's a gentle reminder to you (and me), as our school year is fully back in swing; remember, it's ok to say "no".  Create priority and rituals  with your family once a week. Make time for the people who bring joy and transparency to your life, instead of  half-heartedly giving to many different groups of people. Get plugged into a people that will encourage and strengthen you, instead of discourage and wear you down. We were not created to be able to do it all! Praise God for that.

A Story About Pam

This weekend, my Meyers Briggs twin (ENFP) Pam Cole, came to Dalton. When she comes, it's always filled with lots of cake, gift giving and a prophetic voice of hope.  Now, usually, Pam goes to sleep for the evening when I'm eating a late lunch, as the Lord wakes her up in the wee moments of the morning to pray. But, we stayed up until about the time she wakes up this weekend, mostly because of this great story I'm about to share with you...

So, my dear Pam spent the day with me Thursday. Visiting with people dearest to me in Dalton, and with those who are always most eager to see her. She spoke a prophetic message over our women that has encouraged me since it has touched my ears. She is a friend that comes into my life speaking hope and love from the Lord to me when I am most in need. She is discerning in that area of my life and hers, and I am so grateful that I know her because the Lord uses her to speak into my heart.

After we spent the day together Thursday catching up, shopping, sharing, the women's dinner, and laughing- it was time to go home to my house. My mom came to Dalton for the evening to hear Pam's message and spend the evening with us Thursday. We told Pam we would meet her at my house (about 5 blocks from the church) since she stayed a bit later chatting with a few women. She has been to my house and has stayed with me multiple times, mind you.

I got home, grabbed a snack, and sat on the couch with my mom waiting for Pam to arrive, hoping to share a glass of wine or two. As long moments passed by, I texted a woman I knew she was in the parking lot with saying "Tell Pam to let you go home! We know you have to work in the morning. We love you!"

I figured Pam was talking with others so, I didn't think anything of it.

About 45 minutes passed by, and I received an e-mail from a stranger. Luckily, we are in the midst of Marketplace madness, so I've been checking my email way more often than I typically do. The subject line read:

"You don't know me but Pam is lost! We are at Panera with her and we have people out looking for where you live!"


We jumped in the car, and drove the .4 miles to find Pam. She had lost her phone from the adventures of the day and so, she befriended a large family who had sent out search parties to find my townhouse, with the only description being "It has a fern out front." Don't worry friends, the police and other members of this family stopped looking for the townhouse with a fern out front,  once we arrived to a closed Panera to pick her up out front. We all had a good laugh at went home. Only Pam Cole could befriend a large amount of strangers, to make them hop in cars in and look for my home... and get the police involved.

All of this being said and shared, there are the people that bring joy and newness into your own life, Pam is certainly one of these for me. I can only assume she is like that for so many others in her realm of influence. Who are the people in your life that bring you hope and a word from the Lord? Who encourages you to know more of Christ by spending time with them? The Lord desires for us to have relationships like this, people to sustain us through the wilderness. To be visible and tangible reminders of the Lord's faithfulness and promises. I have a few people that do this. Pam Cole is one- I'm thankful for her intercession on my behalf- and on behalf of CCP. Reach out to the people who need  you to do this for them. Pray for someone, and let them know! Write a note to remind them of God's love. For people that are relationally driven like my sister Pam, this will bring them a great sense of fulfillment  and joy to be able to walk alongside of someone else. I've experienced and seen it! Go on, be a Pam.

Finally, back on the couch. 

Reading Between the Lines

Since October, we've (the children and I) been talking a lot about heaven. As the result of tragedy and grief, children want to be comforted with the "what happens next" of death. I've had multiple parents come to me with concern of their children claiming that they're excited to be in heaven. Now, for a family of non-believers that could raise concern. Anytime a child talks about death in the context of their own life it makes parents uncomfortable. But, as I've been soothing and telling our families that this is the sweetest affirmation of what our children know about God and the fulfillment of being with Jesus eternally. This is their declaration and curiosity of wanting a deeper relationship with Christ. Praise God! This is what we pray for! We want our children excited to know Jesus and glorify Him forever. Amen?

As parents and leaders of children, we can choose to interpret scripture from a place of being scared, and wanting to have all of the control/answers in our own lives. But, as I'm seeing, it's so much more beautiful when we choose to listen and live out the promises of Christ as our children do. Do I speak about longing for heaven? Not as much as I should.  Being in heaven means no tragedy, no sin, perfection and dwelling and seeing Jesus forever. If that's what our children long for- and speak of, then I will advocate for their want to be closer to Jesus- and know Him more. There are ways for us to make that happen here on earth! We can help them know more of Christ through how we love, how we teach, how we serve... I think they understand in the simplest form that we were made of eternal dwelling, we were not made for this world. They have full knowledge that in Heaven, in His presence, is where we will know Him fully. So, friends, I long for that day, too. I long to see Him face to face- and be done with sadness, illness, and tragedy. Of course, the conversation of death shouldn't be taken lightly with children but, I don't think it's ever something that we as adults should scare them from, just because we don't have all the answers about it.

Last week, I taught about the Holy Spirit and Pentecost during our CCP Kids Bible Study. With each group, we talked about how it could have been scary to be hiding in the upper room, with violent winds, resting tongues of fire upon each of the followers of Jesus, and people speaking in tongues. But, instead, this is how we interpreted it:

We believe God has complete control of everything.
God wanted to give us more of Himself as a help and guide to be with us forever.
It came in a way only God could show, instead of a way we give gifts.
God did some awesome things- that no one could ever try to do themselves.

At the end of the lesson, I even had groups of kids begging to read the next chapter in Acts. I call that successful. If ever a child wants to know more about scripture, I can't help but say... "Alright, Let's keep reading!"

As leaders, it's our calling to help children read between the lines of scripture and daily life. It's our job to help them apply the truths of the Gospel to their own lives of faith. We can allow the facts of violent winds and lots of foreign languages being spoken at the same time scare them; OR, we can choose to help them see that ONLY God can do these things. We trust God! We know God loves us and wants the best for us, so we shouldn't be afraid.

It's my job as your family and child's advocate in the kingdom, to help you interpret and answer the hard questions. It is my great JOY and privilege to do so along side of your precious families. I pray for you daily as you lead your child through scripture, through his\her faith- and that you feel equipped by the Holy Spirit as your kids spout out the tough questions. Be encouraged by their curiosity and desire to know more of Christ. The questions mean that God is at work, and the Holy Spirit is moving in their lives. They wouldn't be asking any questions about faith if the Holy Spirit wasn't prompting them to do so. What sweet encouragement!

Reconciled to Reconcilers

This week, I've had a middle school girl come and ask for a listening ear regarding middle school girl "drama". Bless her. Little does she know, I still wake up in the middle of the night with nightmares of my mean girl days. I have dreams that I walk into the lunchroom and everyone is whispering because the jeans I'm wearing don't have the cool designer label. #help. So, I may not be the best one to advise her, because I still break out into a sweat thinking about the brutality of 7th grade.

As we stayed up late texting last night, I was reminded of one of my favorite excerpts of Paul's letters to the Church in 2 Corinthians. In Chapter 5, we so often hear the verse "If anyone is in Christ, He is a new creation the old has gone, the new has come!" Which is so beautiful, and one of the most encouraging images portrayed in the New Testament. The fact that my old, dusty and broken life is made brand new through Christ gives me great hope and a high calling. 

BUT, here's what I reminded my sweet middle school friend,  if we keep reading in verse 18, here's what that means for us as we live out our faith:

"All of this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting our sins against us. And He has committed to us the message of reconciliation. We are therefore Christ's ambassadors, as though God were making His appeal through us. "

We now, are given a task after accepting our newness. We, as reconciled people, are called to continue the work of Christ's reconciliation. The Reconciled become the Reconcilers. After restoring relationship with Christ, we are called to restore a right relationship with people in our lives, and to even lead others to a right relationship with Jesus. Paul says it clearly, this is now a ministry to all of us. It's not an optional way of living, it's not an option that some are called to. It's a way of living in light of the Gospel, being a new creation, fashioned to look more like Christ and make His glory known.

When people are called to their own call to ministry in workplaces, in their homes, or those with a with individual gifts, those are all specialized. Christ doesn't call for us ALL to go out and spread the gospel through singing. (Praise the Lord for that.)  But, this ministry of reconciliation, is universal, a calling and a mission for all of Christ's disciples. It's a ministry that we are united in, a calling that isn't an option.

Where this week are you going to bring about reconciliation to Christ? How are you going to help others be reconciled in their relationships? How are YOU yourself going to mend and fix relationships that are not right in your life? In the words of Paul, Christ is making His appeal for reconciliation and newness through US! How will you make that known?

In Balance

In high school, I remember one night getting home from a high school swim meet very late, needing to study for multiple tests, and bursting into tears when my parents reminded me to turn off my headlights after parking in front of the house. Is that cause for tears? I think not.

To say that my emotional health and state was unbalanced and in flux in high school, is an understatement. I could hardly verbalize what I was feeling.   I wasn't getting enough sleep, I had just had a full day at school, a 4 hour long swim meet, school work to finish,  college applications, plus I occasionally wanted to see my friends. As I've been teaching our kids the past few weeks about all of these characteristics of the church and of God that all are so different from one another, I've been reminded of that night in high school that nothing in my life was in balance, and... the ways my life still most definitely aren't balanced.

But, here's the beauty I've found in all of these qualities of God I've been teaching. He is perfectly all. He is perfectly balanced. He is perfectly equal in everything He says He is. Praise God!  When God is wrathful and calls us to repent, He is equally full of grace and mercy. When God is judging and convicting, He is equally forgiving and merciful. When He calls us to care for the orphans and oppressed, He equally desires for us as individuals to draw closer to Him.  When my life looks like a scale that is tipping, with bitterness running over and my mercy for others running dry; God looks like thousands of different scales all equally weighted the same.  He is perfect in His character. I'm so thankful that God's character is nothing like mine, and He was not fashioned in my image. We would know wrath but not love. We would know grace without salvation.

Where I am weak, He is strong. I was asked last night with a group of women what it looks like to "delight in my weakness". I think it means where we are unbalanced, and our bitterness and judgement takes ahold of our lifestyle, we can rely upon Christ to help us become more like Him. Because in reality, that's what I desire. I pray for my life to reflect the equality that Christ's does. So, as I'm being fashioned and made into His likeness, I pray for my scales that are always far from equilibrium, to be adjusted to reflect more of His. Jesus, give me equal parts love and grace, repentance and forgiveness, conviction and delight. I pray for our children and all of you daily as we all "becoming". We are all "becoming" more like something. Is that something more like the culture of 2015? Or, are you being transformed and becoming more like Christ? Are you allowing Him to show you His equality and allow His perfection to transform your way of being a disciple?