Equally As Able

When I was growing up, we sat on the same pew every single Sunday in "big church". We filed on the pew where all the extended Nickles sat. It usually meant that people were sitting in laps and squished against the wooden pew end. My sister and I would fight about who got to sit next to dad, because he would (and still does) extend his arm on the back of the pew. So that meant, it was just the perfect amount of space, for an elementary school girl,  to snuggle up and lean against his side. We would also fight about who got to sign everyone in on the Friendship pad. This was probably the same year that dad kept a running list (with dates) of whose turn it was to sit up front in his car...pre airbag.  Let's just say we argued. We were not always well behaved. Sunday mornings confined in a pew with my sister, were usually recipes for uncontrolled laughter with loud whispers OR snatching pencils out of each other's hands with rage. The beauty of having siblings...

Here we are, disguised as two sisters, who always get along...and match.

I digress. When we sat in this pew, there was another family that sat in front of us, also religiously. They had two children older than us, who were quiet and way cooler. They sat with their parents and elderly grandmother, who at the time, was about 90. Every week, we looked forward to getting to worship early because we knew that meant being offered a peppermint or candy. Bless that Mrs. Brock. She heard the loud giggles, she heard the quick snaps of my parents' angry fingers, she sat on the end of the pew and watched us as we were confirmands, she beamed with pride as we sang upfront with the children's choir and she greeted us with warm hugs as worship was over every morning. Some Sundays, she even offered to have one of us sit with her. And sometimes... we had to take her up on it. She saw (and heard) my parents teach us how to worship. They taught us what it was like to be a part of the community of faith, not simply exist there and keep quiet.  Some mornings it was hard. Those Sundays usually included the rows of people who sat behind us, coming up and giving my parents a good pat on the back with a laugh. Some mornings, it was a delight to sing harmony next to my mom, reading the hymnal and taking tally of our pastor's stories.

I've been questioned a lot this summer about why we didn't have "children's church" during worship over the summer months. I want you, as a church body, to know the reasoning and theology- it's not because our volunteers are tired by the end of the school year (even though that is true). It's because we're trying to give you, parents, an opportunity to teach your child how to worship. It's so easy to send them off to age appropriate time for stories, games and crafts. I am your child's biggest advocate for age appropriate content and learning. I promise! It gives me great joy to creatively teach the gospel in a way that your child developmentally can grasp.

But, just as I harp on the congregation about their baptismal vows, you've vowed the same exact thing. I've tearfully watched you. (You know I love nothing more than a baptism.) You, parent, have vowed to teach them to worship. When other is there time to practice worship except during worship? So that means, even when it's hard. Even when you don't think they understand. You've vowed to help them be integrated into the life of our worshipping community. It's not about waiting until they can pray, believe or worship a certain way. You've vowed to help mold their hearts to WANT to worship. Not just let them blindly sit in your pew as everyone else is engaged in the parts of the service. Obviously, because of their age, and attention span, we know not all of our youngest children can sit through worship. THAT is why children's church exists; to help spiritually supplement those who developmentally cannot make it the entire service. It doesn't exist for childcare. It doesn't exist to teach your children the fundamentals of how to worship within our church family (reminder, that's your biblical role as a parent). It exists for the hard Sundays. It exists so that families can slowly integrate their child into the worshipping community. It isn't meant to be a substitute for worshipping with the body of Christ. Children can worship the exact same way adults can. It just takes guidance, explanation of words, and patience on the part of adults.  I promise. If any adults disagree, just send them my way. Come at me! 

Theologically, our church believes that a child is just as important as the adults they belong with! Both are equally created in the image of God; both equally important in the kingdom. Meaning their worship is equally important to God. Praise God for that! So, I am advocating for children to be present. I'm advocating for children to be seen. I'm advocating for parents to teach their children in the pew. I'm advocating that other adults be the village parents need in order to teach worship habits. It really does go beyond your wisdom and knowledge- bring in the people who sit around you at church into the responsibility of raising your child to worship. Ask other families who have done it well for tips. It's hard- but it's creating a habit and a lifestyle that they will practice their entire lives. What other activity will follow them the entirety of their lives? Do you want the ONE activity they do forever to be taught by anyone other than you? 

The end of September, I'll be teaching a worship education class for children (and their parents) ages 5-2nd grade. Let us help you! Let me get your family paired up with members who would LOVE to sit with you and your learning worshipper in the pew. Let us resource and encourage you, as parents and members of our congregation to help our children learn how to worship.